The Spreadsheet

I have wavered on what is best for Cindy at times, influenced in part by wavering on what is best for me. Had this been my journey we might be back home already, but the intuition that being out here is best for Cindy overcomes that. Lately I’ve needed more than intuition to go on. I did what any geeky person would do and put together a spreadsheet of the good and bad for Cindy, contrasting being out here with being back home.

There are some things that are the same for either situation. Knowing deep inside that something is wrong with her, Cindy occasionally will be sad. Out here those times usually occur in the mornings when we are breaking camp, back home either mornings or afternoons, but they will occur either way. Overall I came up with a slight edge in favor of being back home for avoiding the bad stuff, due mainly to the discomfort and challenges experienced by all long distance hikers, magnified for someone with a disability.

However, what surprised me (perhaps I wanted a different result?) was how heavily the spreadsheet favored being out here for the good that occurs. There are the obvious reasons in favor of this journey, the constant access to nature and exercise, but also some not so obvious reasons. In particular there is more opportunity for fun and laughter during this journey, as well as for social contact.

Having more social contact while in wilderness may seem contradictory. Yet out here people are with Cindy constantly. Back home Cindy has good friends that take her out occasionally, and I’ve experimented with stuff like volunteering at a day care, but folks don’t, nor can they, drop in 24/7. Not even I can be with her as much at home as I can out here.

I can sympathize with anyone’s objection to a geeky spreadsheet determining anyone’s fate, but after its completion I received independent confirmation of the result. While at Waldo Lake our “new” good friend Carolyn observed how wonderful this experience is for Cindy, observing her to be “glowing” out here. Coincidentally, this is the same comment a pastor in Missouri made about Cindy when we hiked through there on the American Discovery Trail.

Another confirmation came while spending time with our “old” good friends, John and Gail Lyons. Gail arranged for me to speak at the Fort Jones Lions Club, which I needed to do before we started the next California phase of hiking. The Lyons have been wonderful to all of us, and identified the assistance to the rest of us from spending time with Cindy independently. Even so, there is often much down time for Cindy in civilization as the rest of her entourage attend to various tasks and diversions. I overheard Gail chatting with Cindy and making the cheerful observation to her how she must prefer being out hiking.

Parting from the Lyons was a little tougher this time around, just as parting from thru-hikers was tougher in Washington than in the states that held out promise we might see them again. As we parted the Lyons called out that they will see us next year, when we come to finish up pieces in Northern California. Hopefully we can make that come true which means Cindy would get to see their Siberian husky Ty again.

Our original plans called for making up some sections we missed in Northern California next. However, with all the fires and smoke that is up here I’ve changed the plan, I think we now are on plan Q, to making up some pieces in Central California, even though that calls for one 6-day stretch. We might do it in five, but as fall arrives the days shorten as does our window for hiking. I’m anticipating that entering the High Sierra while the weather is still pleasant will more than make up for the long stretch and short days, independently from what a spreadsheet might say.