This is a “part two” post carrying over from the last one. While we were at Wally’s Drive-in eating our fish and chips, an elderly couple came into the restaurant. The bearing of the man, along with the overalls he wore, was that of a farmer. I overheard him say to Jessica that he came there because he had heard good things about their fish. What particularly caught my eye was his wife, who seemed to be suffering from something like Parkinson’s.
I sat back to witness two scenes, one the farmer and wife, the other Mike and Cindy at our table. The couple wore solemn expressions the whole time; I wondered if they ever experienced joy anymore. Meanwhile Mike and Cindy were all smiles and joking around.
I know my recent posts have been less than upbeat recently, impacted by the trying conditions we encountered in Northern Washington. Yet here was Cindy, smiling and vibrant, over her cold and enjoying life, unaware of the total reality of her condition. No doubt the solemn woman was much more aware of her condition; that full cognitive function was more curse for her than a blessing.
When I first suspected Cindy might be deteriorating out here, before I knew a cold was the culprit, both Charissa and Mike consoled me that from what they could see she was better off out here. I was not seeing that at the time, perhaps blinded by my own cold and struggles with the trail conditions at the time. Cindy’s demeanor at Wally’s Drive-in highlighted that overall she is enjoying life, something not always true, perhaps not usually true, for people with degenerative diseases.
I need to keep in mind how much in the moment Cindy is. This last stretch from Chinook Pass to White Pass highlighted that. As we took our first steps to hike Cindy said, with a smile, she’d rather be home. This is a common sentiment for any thru-hiker starting to hike again after a layoff. For Cindy this sentiment would be all the stronger because during the layoff it was often suggested to her what she should do when she gets home.
When she expresses this sentiment I tell her we can stop at any time, but then we cannot do the PCT. That is enough to bring her into this moment as she pensively replies: “Oh, I want to do that.” Apprehensive of the strong dose of what we should do at home that she got, I introduced a bit of reality about home.
There is good and bad in every way of life; that’s true for thru-hiking, that’s true for living at home. I’ve learned some things on this journey that I hope I can apply to make Cindy’s home life better, but some things can’t be changed. I reminded her about one unpleasant reality that cannot be changed; the effect was dramatic. I do not intend to use this tactic often, because I don’t want to create an overall apprehension for home, but it helped Cindy to realize the same thing I did in Wally’s Drive-in, that she is involved in something that overall makes her vibrant and happy.
About a mile south from Chinook Pass I commented that it was nice to be exercising again. Totally unaware of any previous discussion, Cindy enthusiastically responded: “I like hiking!” When we reached Dewey Lake I half considered making camp there but Cindy chastised us to move on. There were a few times on this last stretch when I thought the time had come or a break but Cindy wanted to keep moving.
Cindy remains in the moment and not all moments are rosy. On the second day out Mike took his leave of us to get back to the car, pick up our friends Dave (Savitt) and Patsy and meet us ahead at White Pass. That second day also turned out to be cloudy. Both factors contributed to Cindy’s slow pace and her constant apprehension that something was wrong, thinking we needed to stay put for others to catch up or wondering where the people were. Explaining constantly that we needed to keep hiking in order to see Mike,Savitt and Patsy was draining.
On our third and last day into White Pass Cindy hiked at a good clip. The sky was mostly sunny and I could respond to her questions with “we will see them today!” I still had to repeat that often, but she kept upbeat about the prospect. With this in mind my intention is to make sure at least two people always are with Cindy on overnights … and to make sure all our days are sunny.
